There is a lot of lore and unsolicited advice floating around about marriage proposals, and while some of it is very good, some other oft-repeated pieces of advice are just not true. Today, we’ve decided to bust three pesky proposal myths:

Photo: By Petronella Photography

Myth: She wants her family present at her proposal

Not necessarily! Even if your sweetheart is very close to her family, she might not want them around at the moment of her marriage proposal. If she is a private person, she may prefer to be alone at such an intimate moment. If she enjoys telling a good story, she may look forward to sharing the good news with her family one by one, so that she can savor the joy. It’s true that some women would love to have their friends and family involved in their marriage proposal, but it’s something you should make sure of before going ahead with your plans.

Myth: She is going to be soooo surprised

Unlikely. While your proposal will ideally come as a surprise, don’t count on her being caught completely unawares. If you have reached the point in your relationship where you are ready to propose, she is already thinking about marriage too. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, either; you should both be in a place where marriage is the next step, and ready to move forward together.

Remember, the proposal itself shouldn’t come as a total surprise, but how and when you propose should.

Myth: You don’t have to ask for her parents’ blessing anymore

Although this can be true, it still definitely depends on your sweetheart and her family. A very modern and forward-looking family might not care one way or another, while a more traditional family would probably view this as a sweet way to show your commitment to their daughter and as respect for their family. Think carefully before you decide not to ask for her parents’ blessing, and consider doing it just as a way of including her parents in your proposal plans.

Still struggling to separate the good advice from the bad? Contact The Heart Bandits. We can guide you through planning your proposal from start to end, from the proposal idea to execution.