If you are a high profile figure like many of our clients or even if you are just a guy worried about your public perception, this article is for you. So many guys worry that their proposal won’t be grand enough. But it seems like now you also have to worry, can the proposal seem too grand? Travel blogger Laura G was recently proposal shamed on Instagram by a bunch of followers who felt her ring was too big to be true and for how grand the proposal was. Can you even believe that there are now wedding shamers out there that will shame your marriage proposal? Or engagement ring shamers to shame your engagement ring? Her boyfriend, Dhar Mann, chose a week long scavenger hunt because Laura already know the proposal was coming but she didn’t know how. We at The Heart Bandits think Dhar did an amazing job. Gorgeous ring, check! Insanely romantic proposal marriage proposal at the Eiffel Tower with gorgeous candles and a string quartet, check! So how did her proposal still end up getting shamed? There is only so much you can do because haters love to hate, but we have put together some tips on how to shame proof your marriage proposal.
Set A Budget
When you are trying to come up with proposal ideas for her, set a budget for the proposal and then stick to it. It is easy to go down the Instagram and Pinterest rabbit hole and keep adding more and more expenses to your marriage proposal concept. However, the more and more you add just for the sake of adding, the more the proposal could come off as inauthentic or showy. Save your money and reduce the potential for proposal shaming by sticking to your proposal budget.
Plan The Proposal For Her
One of the biggest ways to get proposal shamed is to plan the marriage proposal hoping to impress someone else. We have had people come to us with big plans in their minds to get their proposals to go viral, to be shared by influencers, to be featured on TV, etc. We are not saying any of that is bad, but what we are saying is that if you start planning your proposal for other people, you open yourself up to getting proposal shamed. And more importantly, you start to lose focus of the true meaning of a marriage proposal which is finding the person you love and that you want to spend the rest of your life with.
Make It Truly Personalized
If you follow my last tip when creating your proposal ideas for her, then creating a proposal concept that is truly personalized should be easy. When an Internet troll is looking online to shame someone, it is harder to do when they see a proposal that is not just showy and glitzy, but one that is filled with unique and personalized elements that are truly special to the both of you. A proposal featuring fireworks, expensive cars, helicopters, and flash mobs is more susceptible to criticism that a person is just trying to have a flashy proposal. But a proposal that is indoors with warm lighting, handwritten notes, or you playing a song you wrote for her is much less likely to attract negative attention. Again, we think ALL of these proposal ideas are great, but we are focusing on how to shame proof your marriage proposal here.
Intimate Proposal vs Public Proposal
If being proposal shamed is a concern, you might be wondering if you should have an intimate, indoor marriage proposal or a public, outdoor marriage proposal. To be honestly the shaming normally happens online where people feel the most brave to say negative things. So neither location will likely have a big influence on whether or not your proposal is shamed by the public. However, if you propose outdoors in a public setting, then there is a higher chance that someone you didn’t authorize to will be taking photos and they could post those photos to start an unwanted conversation or shaming session. This is particularly important for our high profile client’s that really want to make sure they are able to manage their image.
Avoid Oversharing
If you are worried about proposal shaming, you may consider not sharing photos on any social media. If you are going to post your marriage proposal pictures online, you might want to change your settings so that only your true friends can see or comment. You may even wish to disable the commenting entirely. Another option is to monitor the comments and delete any negative comments since those can spread like wildfire.
When you propose to your partner, you want the proposal planning experience to be stress-free for her from the beginning until the end. But some people don’t even think about how much stress it could cause your partner if she is proposal shamed on social media. Reading these tips on how to shame proof your marriage proposal has hopefully helped you think through some of the things you might not have otherwise thought about when planning your special day.
How Can The Heart Bandits Help?
If you want to make sure your marriage proposal has just the right amount of flash but not too much that you end up being the talk of Instagram, contact The Heart Bandits today. We will take your proposal from meh….to WOW!!! Here are some reasons you might want to hire a Proposal Planner to help you shame proof your proposal:
- You are a public figure and want the feedback and guidance of a professional
- You need help creating and sticking to a proposal budget
- You need just the right balance of flash and personalization in your proposal
Also, don’t forget to think about how you will hide your engagement ring on your proposal day. Check out our flat ring boxes at ringstash.com.
Proposal Planning: The Heart Bandits
Photography: Paris for Two Photography
Michele
